Inspite of what you might actually think, feel, or see out of
your window, the summer of 2000 was brill, says weather man Philip Eden of the Press
Association Weather Centre. It just goes to show statistics can be made to prove
Forget global warming or any talk of unseasonal weather: according to The Guardian,
the PA’s Philip Eden said the summer of 2000 was the 24th best in the last 100. 24th
best eh? My arse.
"August 2000, like June and July, had an incomprehensible bad press. In nearly
all regions [according to them] it was warmer, drier and sunnier than average.
"If it were possible to dig it up and transplant it to an earlier year, it would
have been regarded as a stunner, for it was better than any August between 1959 and
Appararently, there 195 hours of tanning time in August (presumably between the snow
storms), which is 111 percent more than normal. The average temperature was 16.8C
(62.2F), a whole degree hotter than usual.
Granted August was a bit better than June and July (which were depressingly wet)
but surely we can’t all be suffering from mass dementia. The only conclusion? The
weather men are lying.
The only weather forecast I now trust is my own. If it looks nice when I look out
of the window, chances are it is nice, and it will get nastier later. Predicting
what’s going to happen is harder – I trust my barometer for local weather, but as
to what’s going to happen, who knows.
Take Bank Holiday weekend. It was meant to piss down, and yet anyone who went to
Cyclefest in Reading (not many of you, I’ll grant – the sports class race had less
entrants than the Singlespeed class!) – had excellent weather. Of course those of
you in other areas of country had everything from torrential downpours to drought.
Time to face facts – the climate is shagged. Not to worry. We’ll probably have a
heatwave in November. No, actually, we probably won’t.